


Costs of Healing

by slbc



Category: Avatar: Legend of Korra, Avatar: The Last Airbender
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-16
Updated: 2021-01-16
Packaged: 2021-03-14 15:55:07
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,992
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28797966
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/slbc/pseuds/slbc
Summary: "When you are young you feel you will live forever. So my friends poured so much of their lives into healing, I am the only one left."AU: Water healing and firebending shortens lifespan.
Relationships: Katara & Zuko (Avatar)
Comments: 2
Kudos: 32





	Costs of Healing

**Author's Note:**

> I got the idea for this AU late at night from random cobbled together theories, so I had to write it. This is the following result. Enjoy!

The first time she heals Katara has just been burnt by Aang. She knows that he didn't mean to, but it hurts just the same. She seeks solace in what is familiar, water, the only thing that has remained constant from the south pole all the way to the equator. In it, she feels something tugging at her, and she gives in to the pull. She watches the water glow, then lifts her hand out of the water, free of burns or even small scabs or patches of healing skin. She marvels at the smoothness of her skin, the miracle that has been brought by water. 

Jeong Jeong comes by to sit by her. 

"You have healing abilities. The great benders of the Water Tribe sometimes have this ability. I've always wished I were blessed like you - free from this burning curse."

“But you’re a great master. You have powers that I will never know.”

“Water brings healing and life. But fire brings only destruction and pain. It forces those of us burdened with its care to walk a razor's edge between humanity and savagery. Eventually, we are torn apart.”

Zhao boats come down the river and Jeong Jeong must go to stall him, but this conversation sticks around in Katara’s head. She makes herself an oath to herself she will not neglect her healing ability.

* * *

"You women should be honored. We give you the exalted position of healers. It is as nature intended. And yet still you challenge me?"

She brushes off these comments at the time, too outraged at the patriarchy established in the Northern Water Tribe to be concerned at the time. But she keeps thinking back to those vague comments, looking for an answer.

She approaches Yugoda's hut, and knocks quietly, unsure if Yugoda is still mad after she ran off from her class. 

"Katara, come in, come in. Did you have something in mind when you came here?"

"Uh, yes Master Yugoda. What did Master Pakku mean about respect for healers and natural positions? Healers don't seem to get much respect, and can’t anyone heal if they want to."

"You came from a place with no waterbenders. You wouldn't know about our traditions. Why do you think the water glows when we heal people?”

She takes a moment to think about it. "Water magic things? I mean I know it's not, but that's what my brother calls it. I just thought it was part of the process. You mean there's a reason why it glows?"

"That is because we put a little bit of our life force into it, Chi one could say. Everyone we heal someone, we shorten our lifespan a little bit. That is why we are greatly respected, as the men appreciate the sacrifices we make."

Word burst out of her in response. "But it doesn’t make sense why it’s natural for women to heal. Why can't I just heal and fight?"

"Women live longer naturally. As for why you cannot fight, I didn't see anyone stopping you from fighting Master Paku." Yugoda smiles, but sobers quickly. "Healing takes Chi from you. Waterbending only moves water around, and can be used indefinitely. Earthbending, airbending, firebending are the same way. Water healing is different, it will take from you. I am the oldest healer because I know this. When you are young you feel you will live forever. So my friends poured so much of their lives into healing, I am the only one left. This is why you must come to my classes. You must heal smarter. Skill is why I have lived so long. Where power can always do the trick, understanding what you are feeling can help you live longer. Come back tomorrow, eh? If you stay, maybe you’ll live to my age."

* * *

“Katara, I want you to have this.” Master Pakku hands over a flask. “This amulet contains water from the Spirit Oasis. The water has unique properties. Don't lose it.” She nods.

Master Yugoda pulls her aside after. "Pakku only gave it to you out of male pride. He doesn’t understand what it does. It has great healing properties, and can heal great wounds. The secret is that it has some of the moon's Chi, and none of yours. With this, you need not worry about your life. Heal as much as you can." She smiles. “Best of luck on your journey.”

* * *

She knows she should tell her brother and Aang about Chi and water healing. But she's sure they would make a huge fuss about it and try to stop her from healing. But can't they see that the people around them need it more than she does. How can they stand not helping people? It gives her hope that there is something after the war to work for. Besides, it's only a little of her life. Everyone has suffered from the war. Why shouldn’t she suffer a little more, so people will suffer less.

So she tells herself she will tell them someday. Then she forgets she ever learned the fact, because she will heal anyone who needs it, because that is who she is.

* * *

Sparring is messy, and no one comes out of it clean. She will heal anyone who asks, but really only Aang does. Toph is too tough to ask for help, and Sokka knows she will make fun of him. 

When Zuko joins the group, she isn't pleased when Aang asks her to heal him after a training session. Zuko shouldn't even be here, and he shouldn’t even be harming Aang. Even worse is when Aang asks Katara to heal Zuko. Just as Katara is about to go off on the both of them, Zuko butts in. 

"I don't need it. I've had worse. Besides it's not fair to her, she'll probably need it herself."

Aang walks off confused at the statement, while Katara just passes it off as Zuko putting up an act of pity, I've had worse. 

It isn't until after she offers to heal him after their trip to the Southern Raiders that she realizes it means something different. When she tries to offer to heal him, he uses the exact same excuse as before. 

When she still tries to heal him, he hisses at her. "Save it. I have had worse you know, you think my childhood was great? Besides, it's not fair that you should have to live shorter just so I don't have to suffer for a few days."

When she tries to feign confusion, Zuko outright glares at her. It's a little bit terrifying honestly. 

"Don't try to act innocent. I know you know how water healing works."

"And what do you know?" she says, trying to bluff her way out of it.

"You realize I was hunting the avatar, so I had to read a lot of books on bending. I know how water healing works. I grew up with lectures about Chi. It’s not just you.” He smiles at her wryly. “What do you think was meant when I say Fire is Life. Fire is our life force, we create it and it is tied to us. Firebending shortens my lifespan too." He shakes his head. "Just another reason the war has to end. People don’t live as long anymore, not just because of the war. People bend too much. It isn't good for them long run. But for the greater good, the war effort, it's okay." Traces of bitterness creep into his voice. "Besides, it's not like anyone knows about it anymore. If word got out, half of the military would desert. I'll probably burn up at 50 or so and people will just say I lived a good life."

He lets out a sharp bark of laughter. Before Katara can react, he walks off. She doesn’t ask to heal him again.

* * *

Zuko is down after taking lightning for her. By Tui and La, Zuko is down after taking lightning for her. She goes after Azula almost in a rage, eventually trapping her in ice and chaining her down. She has to heal Zuko. Zuko has to survive, he doesn’t deserve to die. She thrusts her hands down over the wound pushing more and more Chi into the wound. She knows Zuko would be mad at her for being so reckless with her life, but she can’t bring herself to care.

She almost collapses in relief as Zuko opens his eyes. He smiles, and the only thing he says is “Thank you.” And that is enough for her for now.

* * *

Azula dies at age 30. Katara hasn't thought of her in so long it comes as a complete surprise. Ozai dying was no surprise, but Azula. The only people invited to her funeral are close friends of Zuko, the people who understood her a little bit. She doubts anyone ever understood Azula but maybe Zuko. She is not surprised when Zuko talks to her later. 

"It was her firebending, wasn't it."

Zuko tiredly runs his hands over the lines of grief and stress on his face. "Yes. Yes it was. The only blue flamed firebender. A prodigy, the best of her generation. I should have seen it coming." He sighs, continuing. "They said she bent less near the end. She would actually talk to me when I visited her. I should have seen this coming." Quieter, he says it again. “I should have seen it coming.”

He gazes at Katara. "However strained our relationship was, I loved her. She was family. You are too. I don't want you to leave the same way she did. Will you dial back the healing a little?" Seeing the suspicion on her face, he quickly responds. "I know you can't just stop. But maybe leave a little more work to your apprentices."

"We'll see." she tells him cryptically. "What about you Mr. Flameo Hotman. Firebending does the exact same thing."

"I'm in no danger. I hardly bend these days. Too many council meetings." He ends with the same question they always tread and retread. "Besides, when are you going to tell them about water healing? No one lives forever. They deserve the truth."

* * *

Sometime in the days after the Agni Kai and the subsequent healing, Zuko mutters, "I owe you a life debt."

Katara is wide awake now. "No you don't, you saved my life then. Don’t think you can pass this off as you said I could."

"I'll find a way to make it up for you."

Katara decides to hold off that conversation for later. "We'll see." She declares. 

They hold off the conversation for another 30 years. Katara doesn't expect anything unusual about her trip to the Fire Nation, so she is surprised when Zuko takes her to a musty old archive. 

"I wanted to show you something.” Zuko says, handing her several scrolls. She glances over them, seeing nothing of interest. 

Zuko clears his throat. "I've forgotten how dry some of these texts could be. Look here, here, and here."

She is pretty shocked. "It says all the elements had healing. Earth healing, air healing, fire healing. How could anyone forget the knowledge of healing?"

"I think it was because healing shortens lives. Someone decided it wasn’t worth keeping. Obviously the water tribes thought that was stupid. Although fire healing." He pauses for dramatic effect, and holds his hand up. It bursts into flames, but not the familiar orange and rusty red flames have, but white with flickers of gold and green. "Has one active practitioner." He grins.

"I can finally pay you back for healing me from lightning. I'll just feed your Fire Chakra a bit, and we'll..." 

"Oh no you don't. " Katara interrupts before Zuko goes any further. "You're the Fire Lord, you're much more important than me."

"Who's to say that I'm more important than you are. You’re still water healing, while I’ve basically stopped firebending. Besides, it's a matter of honor."

"No, it's a matter of my compassion and caring. You don’t owe me anything. Don’t make this about you."

He straightens his back and glares at her. It's no longer as terrifying as it used to be. "It's my honor."

"Is my compassion. " She meets his glare and challenges him to push back. 

They stare at each other for a while before Zuko caves. "Fine. But when are you going to tell everyone that you have a shortened life span?"

"When the time is right." She walks out into the sunlight, intent on enjoying the time she has with her old friend Zuko, not in a dusty old archive. They don’t talk of it for the rest of Katara’s visit.

* * *

They meet up over the years. There is something about talking to someone who understands that something can be both a gift and a curse.

Their last meeting like this is after Aang's funeral. They meet up again, mourning the kids of their greatest friend.

“I’m going to die soon. I think I've only lasted this long because I wanted to, and now? Now, I'm not sure what I want.”

"You've always been too concerned with what other people think. I've been selfish much more than you, and I enjoy it."

"You! You slave away behind a desk for hours for your country. You claim to enjoy it? But I'm serious. I don't think I'll last the day. I have one final request. Look after me when I die."

"In the morning I suppose. I don't actually believe you'll actually be dead. Good night Katara."

Katara prepares herself for what is certain to be her last night.

* * *

She falls asleep, content in knowing all the work she has done, from healing to teaching has helped better the world somehow. She is surprised when she awakes in the spirit world. 

She gasps as she sees Yue. She is still as young as the night she ascended, while Katara has changed over the decades. 

"Katara." Yue gets her with a smile. "You haven't been taking care of yourself have you?"

"Yes, technically. But no, because people needed me."

"Of course you did. But you are not long for your world. But I have come to give you a gift."

"A gift?" she echoes.

"Spirit water uses my Chi to heal people. Who says I can’t give it directly to you? Let all who hear my gift. You'll die at the age you were meant to live out."

Katara is relieved, but somewhat lost. "But what am I supposed to live for."

"For yourself of course. Zuko was right about you. Take some time for yourself. Of course sometimes what you want isn’t quite so different from what other people want. Say hello to the next Avatar for me."

With that Yue fades away leaving Katara to wake up.

* * *

Zuko no longer wakes up at sunrise. He could start waking up at sunrise anytime he wanted, but he doesn't. It isn’t because he's getting old of course.

Kya greets him on the way to Katara’s room, along with her siblings. "Where are you going, Uncle Zuko?"

"Your mother's dead."

An equally dead silence falls. Tenzin, who is more used to Zuko’s awkwardness, decides to bull through.

“You don’t mean that, do you?”

“She says she will be dead. But I don’t actually believe it. I suppose we’ll see.”

They bombard him with questions. He ignores them all and continues walking down the hallway. They soon arrive at Katara's room. Zuko kneels down to take her pulse, and friends after a second. 

"It's slow. Too slow." Zuko turns to face them. "Has she told you about the real cost of water healing? I know Kya must know." Kya pales in response as the others shake their heads. "Well I've always wanted to do this."

He raises his hand and slaps it across her face. She gasps and sits upright.

"All better now? You aren't dead."

"What did you do?"

"Slapped you." Katara rears up and slaps him back. Before she can unleash the inevitable tirade of words, Zuko speaks. "Have a nice long overdue conversation with your children, will you?"

He leaves, letting Katara finally tell the truth to her children.

* * *

She is dying for the second time in her life. She knows this will be the end of her time here on earth. She has set out to do everything she needs to do. She has summoned all her relatives and friends to the South Pole. They tell her that they’re not ready for her to leave, but she insists that she is. So many friends and family are gone. Suki. Sokka. Aang. Zuko.

When she is on the brink of death on a night not unlike one in which Zuko visited her, she summons Korra. Korra seems on the brink of crying.

“I’m not ready for you to leave yet. The Avatar is such a big job to do. You always give such good advice. Please, you surely can’t be dying, can you?”

Katara smiles. “I already accepted I would die back when Aang died. I came back to help you become the Avatar. You’re ready. After all you’ve faced, how can you not say you’re ready? Besides, I will be able to see my old friends again.”

“But Toph is still here.”

“Toph is an immortal witch, and I know that she can hear me. My life was given by Tui, and back to Tui I shall go. Now get out and let me die in peace.” In a softer voice. “I’m proud of you Korra. It’s no longer my world. It’s also yours. Always remember that okay? Now shoo. I still need to sleep.”

“Good night, I suppose.” Korra doesn’t quite meet her gaze as she leaves her room.

All that is left for her is to die. She can see Yue. “Are you ready for the next step?” And from water Katara came, water she goes back to.

**Author's Note:**

> That's a wrap! Thank you for reading. I meant to make this angstier(the basis of this AU is practically begging for it), but I don't know enough about LoK to write a full divergence.


End file.
